About Me



My Secret Cafe...
is a place where I share the things that make me smile, things that inspire me, are useful to know or are just simply beautiful and amazingly brilliant or stylish.

I love discovering new things and talking about them. It might be a new fashion or beauty product, a must-have plant for my secret garden, or healthy food ideas that are simple, tasty and good. It could be a stunning new photo, piece of art or decor or really anything that gets me excited enough to share with others, who knows!!

I hope you stop by again and enjoy discovering some of my secrets too!

Jayne




Saturday 13 August 2011

The Secret...By Jan Warburton...



This book is the ultimate 'Summer' or Holiday read!  Available on 'Kindle' from Amazon. Romance, intrigue, mystery and murder!
Do check it out!

Thursday 11 August 2011

How Blissful...A Vintage Tea Party!



I decide to host a 'Vintage Tea Party' for my 8-year-old and her friends to celebrate the end of the school year. So out came the antique 3-tier cake stand and vintage china, also some lovely vintage patterned bunting! It was very authentic with everything homemade, cucumber and tuna, roast chicken and smoked cured ham and cheese sandwiches. Then lots of naughty sweet delights, again homemade, fresh scones with strawberries and fresh cream, lemon drizzle cake, tea loaf, chocolate brownies, vanilla angel cakes, chocolate chip muffins, and delicious flapjack. I had a lovely time baking and preparing all this. Something I so rarely get time to do when working!!! 

Do something nice for your kids and see how much you enjoy it too!!

Thursday 16 June 2011

Le Orange...

Ooh la la...I treated myself to this gorgeous lipstick from YSL last weekend and I adore the colour, texture etc. The shade in 'Le Orange', I would describe as a rich orange red in 'Rouge Pur Couture' is one of those amazingly versatile colours that illuminates your face. You need to go minimal on eye make-up and blusher to balance the look. It seems to be a colour to suit blondes and brunettes alike providing you don't have a pink tone to your complexion. Would look great with a light golden tan...Of course the packaging is pretty elegant also...Why not treat yourself too!!

Sunday 12 June 2011

Dioressence...


Yes, that's the name of this beautiful rose...Available from Crocus at http://crocus.co.uk from November onwards.

Thursday 9 June 2011

The Stress Factor...

Stress is something we all have to deal with from time to time and for many of us it is just part of today's ever demanding lifestyle. I personally have suffered form stress to a point where it was affecting my physical health not just being able to cope mentally and it reared it's ugly head in the form of 'Panic Attacks'. Many people today suffer from panic attacks with symptoms varying from heart palpitations, increased heart rate, dizziness, aching in the limbs, extreme tiredness, skin rashes, sweating, to physically shaking and emotional distress. The scary and worst part is that you have no control over them as your body takes over and produces adrenaline which gives you all of those nasty physical symptoms. It basically means the body is on constant 'high-alert' or you may have heard of the 'fight or flight reaction'. The hard part is getting the body to calm down and bring it's adrenaline levels back to normal again so the symptoms subside. For anyone who has not suffered from them before this can be a very frightening experience and many people fear they are going to die or they are going crazy hence the panic sets in and so there is a an unfortunate 'vicious circle of events' that make it an all-consuming terror for sufferers. There is also the feeling of embarrassment as people fear no one will understand or take them seriously.


I wanted to share my experience with people because I think support is vital. Sharing and knowing that you are not alone, not going crazy and that it is just a build up of stress for whatever reason that has caused your body to react this way, not your mental stability, gives reassurance and comfort. Your body can only handle so much stress on a n ongoing basis and though you may not have realised it, your body could have been taking this on over a period of time and dealing with it just fine.


Most of my stress came from my job and over a period of 18 months it took it's toll on me. I work in a secondary school as a Cover Supervisor, supervising work set by subject teachers in their absence, with 11-16 yr olds. Cover Supervisors have replaced supply teachers as permanent members of staff within schools as they cost a lot less. So, yes I get paid, I think very little, for the job I do. The biggest part of my job is behaviour management and explaining the set work to the students. Although teaching the subject is not part of my remit, more often than not the expectation is to help answer students questions, so a very good all-round academic knowledge is really important in core subjects. I am also highly creative, so this means I can be more involved and helpful in creative subjects too. So you could say I am pretty much a 'Jack-of-all-Trades' when it comes to my role.

Everyday I go in to work, no idea what subjects I might be covering, what year groups or students I might have... in fact it is a bit like a lottery! Sometimes I don't mind the variety that gives, but sometimes I long for some predictability in my day and not having to think on my feet constantly! I can't plan anything for a lesson or rarely have any prior knowledge of the work set. Therefore, I am at the mercy of whatever work has been set by that subject teacher! It is literally a matter of 'think on your feet' in every aspect of classroom management!

As you can imagine it is demanding and mentally draining at times! So here is where the stress initiates for me. Of course, then I have my own family to go home and deal with at the end of the day. there are parts of my job I enjoy. There are some nice kids who you get to know and have positive, productive school relationships with. Showing an interest in them and sometimes helping them with there issues at school and then go to achieve great things can be highly rewarding and for me is the reason in stay in my job.The school I work at is a very good school but unfortunately, as everywhere kids today are brought up differently, have different attitudes and the power to manage behaviour in schools is limited with ever-changing policy and quite often no support from parents/carers...so a challenging task!! The downside is I can't get to know the kids the way their subject teachers do, so my involvement is therefore limited and the satisfaction and reward minimal. I digress, my 'panic attacks' as |I mentioned earlier started after 18 months into my job. I saw my doctor, tried various medications to help with sleep and calm me down but nothing really dealt with the problem because the problem wasn't going to go away.

So, through Occupational Therapy at work, I was given a week off. I decided that I would take time just to focus on coping with my panic attacks. I found the following techniques helped me tremendously at the time:

* Slowing down my breathing by focusing on the rythmn and depth. This consequently then had an effect   on reducing my heart rate and that horrible panic 'fight or flight' feeling. It takes at least 5-10 minutes for this to take effect but it does work. Apparently, the way it works is that although you cannot slow your heart rate down yourself you can physically control or slow your breathing and this in turn has the effect of slowing your heart.

* The other thing I did in conjunction with the breathing technique was to think of something soothing and calming eg. I thought of the calming image of the Agean Sea and it's beautiful crystal turquoise colour waters, and floating in it. The two hand-in-hand work really well and I recommend trying. Don't expect instant results, as I said it can take anything from 5 to 10 minutes to take effect but persevere, it can really make a difference and can be used anytime you feel an attack coming on.

* Make a concerted effort to focus on the positive and precious things in your life and value them. It is all to easy to get caught up in negativity and Pa's have a disastrous effect of making you feel you are no longer in control, but believe me you can regain that control and when you eventually do come out the other side you can feel proud that you did deal with it, and stronger too. Although initially you still feel drained from the whole ordeal you will get there. Just don't be too hard on yourself, congratulate yourself when you make small positive steps and gradually you will see that the PA's are no longer part of your life. I remember suddenly realising that I hadn't had one for over a week!! They can go away just as quickly as they appeared.

* Find a focus, a new hobby, interest or activity that takes your mind off the negative effect of PA's. Many people find that a physical activity, and that can be even just walking or gardening but something physically active can burn off the excessive adrenaline in your body which in turn stops it giving you those horrible panic symptoms.

* Finally, remember...small steps...talk to someone about how you're feeling don't keep it bottled up. You are NOT ALONE. Sharing it with someone else can really lift a huge weight and you'll be surprised how many other people you know actually have been through exactly the same thing.

I hope my experiences and technique's might help others. Please, let me know if they do or if you have anything that has helped you to deal with PAs and you'd like to share here.

Tuesday 7 June 2011

The Purity of a White Rose...


I found this classic rose at Chelsea. A rambler 'City of York' which I am going to have growing through a dead tree. Should look stunning once established and ramblers get going fast!! It's pure cream white with a lemon centre with defined stamens...gorgeous don't you think?!

Monday 6 June 2011

Thunder...


As promised another beauty from Chelsea...a peony, 'Golden Thunder'. Just imagine this planted with Iris 'Mysterieux' (see previous blog) or another rich purple tall-bearded iris!! 'Golden Thunder' has a bronzy, smokiness quality to the flowers as they age. 

I was not a peony fan until 2 years ago when I planted Peony 'Buckeye Belle' and it hasn't stopped delighting me since. Peonies may not flower for long but when they do they are 'show-stoppers' and the foliage is big, interesting and quite tropical, lasting until autumn so they don't disappoint even when the flowers are long gone! These plants really do make an excellent long-term investment! Peony 'Golden Thunder' is available from Kelways.

The Ultimate Body Lotion...

Yes, it's here...the ultimate body lotion that has an ongoing moisturising effect! 

I have tried so many and thought OK so let's try another new one thinking it would be OK but just another body lotion. But guys, honestly I have to say I am so impressed with Garnier's New Intensive 7 Days Body Lotion...from the rich but easily absorbed texture to how long it leaves a wonderful luxurious silky feeling that lasts like no other!! My skin felt soft, smooth and totally hydrated the following day and the next...Try it and you'll see. I have not found this level of long-term hydration except from the more expensive brands until now. It comes in Aloe Vera, Shea Butter, Mango and Cocoa Butter depending on how dry your skin is and is available in leading stores.

Saturday 4 June 2011

Chelsea 2011...

 Digitalis 'Saltwood Summer'...a foxglove but not like a foxglove more like an orchid.
Sorry Guys...I know I haven't posted for a week but it's been a hectic week, down at Chelsea Flower Show then half-term break!! Anyway, I'm back with lots of goodies. Found some stunning new (some not so new, but I have only just discovered them) plants to add to your collection and mine of course. Here is one beauty...I will share a new one or two with you each day this week!




Here's another...Anemone 'Wild Swan'...this won 'Plant of the Year' for 2011. It is a very elegant, beautiful plant and worthy of it's title...It has delicate white petals with a soft blue on the reverse...you'll love it.

Saturday 21 May 2011

Chelsea Flower Show...

Going to Chelsea this Thursday, May 26th...Pic of me at Chelsea 2009...
 So we're off to Chelsea Flower Show, the horticutural equivalent of London Fashion Week!!
Where the world's top garden designers get to show of their designing skills and achieve the ultimate accolade of 
an RHS Chelsea Gold or the absolute ultimate award, 'Best in Show'.
 



I will post some great pics on my return. Plus my favorite and best new finds in the plant world....very exciting!!

Thursday 19 May 2011

My Secret Indulgences...Ostrich







I have a couple of these and absolutely adore them...I don't know what it is about the texture of ostrich leather (of course real would be fab but v. expensive) these little real leather faux ostrich beauties are must-have accessories in my wardrobe. Ostrich leather has a unique finish and pattern to it which simply oozes class. I have a black one, a nude coloured one and a tan one. Check out this one in tan...

Wednesday 18 May 2011

Introducing Ben...




This is Ben, our  cream Persian. Ben is extremely lazy, sleeps a lot. But he is the most adorable, patient and soft-hearted saggy old cat. Alexia has grown up with him and he has never put out a claw even when dragged around, cuddled to death, dressed up, teased and fussed.

I love it...Marmite...Cashews? Yes...


OMG...I have just discovered two of my favourite things rolled into one...Marmite Cashews! At first, I have to say I was a little scared the combination might not work, but I was pleasantly relieved as I love both so yeah...thank you sooo much whoever came up with the idea of putting them together. Very addictive I'm afraid!!

Do you have any two flavour combinations that work really well together?

Tuesday 17 May 2011

My Secret Garden



Wonderful Trilliums...


Love these woodland beauties...Here's one from our garden.

Starting School...Precious Days





I came across this image of my daughter on her first day at school. She looks so excited and carefree. She is now in Year 3 and still loves school which is great and enjoys learning and achieving. Only today she proudly announced over dinner, "Mummy, Daddy I got into 'Gold' today!" 


I hope that doesn't change when she gets to high school or secondary as it is more often known in the UK. In my job, secondary education, I watch our new Year 7's as they start every September and the change in them by the 3rd term is quite something (some even after a term). They come in so eager to learn and experience secondary education but somewhere on the way so many get distracted by outside influences and lose their way...I digress, this a topic for another day. I think it's important to remember just how quickly our children grow up these days and enjoy those precious years when things are innocent and uncomplicated and hormones haven't kicked in!!

Have you any favourite memories of school or education you could share?

Royal Purple and Gold...


Planting Combinations...Had to take a photo of Bearded Iris 'Mysterieux' looking stunning against the gold fan-like leaves of Acer Shirasawanum 'Aureum'.

Saturday 14 May 2011

Subtle Shimmer...

Bobbi Brown Long-Wear Metallic Cream Eyeshadows...


I absolutely adore these shadows as they give such a subtle sheer shimmer that can be worn in the day time without looking overdone. 'Chrome Patina' and 'Brown Metal' are my favorites. So good because they don't crease, last all day and are just enough to create an understated yet glamorous finish to your look.

Raindrops on Roses...



My Rose Souvenir du Dr. Jamain is covered in stunning rich velvety burgundy colour. As perfect as the colour of vintage bordeaux. It has remarkable fragrance that just transports you into an English summer rose garden. This truly amazing rose is vigorous and a real performer! 

I think roses really give you so much pleasure for your money and make an excellent shrub. Not particularly high maintenance, as people seem to think. They just need a good feed every month or so. I use a seaweed based liquid feed, full of micro nutrients, and a sprinkling of Potash. Pruning need only be done once or twice a year (October and March). Dead heading of course encourages more blooms. You can remove greenfly by hosing down on an evening, if you get them, so avoiding the need for pesticide based sprays. Roses that flower prolifically and repeatedly give you perfect fragrant cut flowers too!! They will tolerate all manner of weather conditions too. With our unpredictable and now somewhat cold English winters that makes them a safe bet.  A good strong healthy rose can last for many decades! Now it doesn't get better than that!


 

Wednesday 11 May 2011

Mysterieux....



Today, one of my favourite irises unfurled to reveal itself in all its beauty. Iris 'Mysterieux' is an amazing variety of tall bearded iris, originally breed from Cayeux in France. I discovered this stunner at Chelsea a few years ago and had to have it!! It is a prolific flowerer when planted in full sun or semi-shade. Strongly fragrant with an orange note. 
Do you have a favourite flower or plant...would love to hear?? Any plant recommendations welcome too!

Sunday 8 May 2011

AVON Key Lime & Passion Flower Volumising Shampoo...

Love this shampoo...so fresh and gives amazing volume and texture to your hair. I stock up regularly on this because not only is it so good but a real bargain beauty buy!! Just contact your AVON rep or you can order online...

Squee...


Alexia, my youngest daughter, affectionately known as Squee, here at six years old. She was originally nicknamed Squidge as a baby, because she was a little squidge, which then got shortened to Squee and 'Squee' she remains and probably always will be Squee to her daddy. I feel so lucky and privileged to have spent those first 3 years with her without having to go back to work. I also did this with my elder daughter Abby, now 20, studying Photography at the University of Falmouth. I think it is so important to be there for all those first steps (literally) in everything they do. Wouldn't have missed it for the world! I know this has given me a special bond with my girls too and I love that! Being a mother is truly one of the most precious gifts you get in life...absolutely nothing compares to those wonderful childhood memories and moments spent together!

These Boots Were Made for Walking...


I came across this photo of my daughter today and it really made me smile. She was only about 10 months old...but even then had attitude and certainly knew what she liked!! She was always dressing up, putting on hats and stuff and here as you can see she decided she was going to wear my boots!! Funny!! Alexia is 8 now! Love her...

Thursday 5 May 2011

Premier Model Skin...


Premier Model Skin I discovered when I followed the Channel 4 programme 'The Model Agency'. The programme interested me because I was a former model, 'a few' years ago (that's another story) and related to the programme. I digress, the skincare products intrigued me. I am a bit of a beauty product obsessive and so decided to try the facial scrub first....loved it and likewise the night cream, really does what it says and smells amazing!!! These products are available from Monu Professional Skincare at www.monushop.co.uk/...

A Little Piece of My Garden...



This is one view of our beloved garden...or 'green oasis'...

Introducing Prowf...

This is our very own Holly Golightly, or 'Prowf' as she is more affectionately known.
'Prowf' because she 'prowfs' a lot...talks non-stop (in cat language of course).


Holly is a Persian and Rag Doll cross-breed...and she is such a 'girlie' cat. She always seems to be around us with something to say...

Wednesday 4 May 2011

My Secret Garden

Peony 'Buck-Eye Belle' is going to look amazing when the numerous buds open into sumptious velvet cups in the coming weeks! Can't wait! They are planted in amongst other favourites of mine, like Aquilegia 'Purple Emperor'.  More tomorrow...